A domestic row a role-play was enacted
Mediator recruitment was the day
A man shouts at a woman
In a mediation session all frustrated
New recruits ourselves – what did we think?
This is quite violent I said
Another disagreed with me
I work in prisons he said
Violence is what I see in there
Silently I disagreed with him
Male physicality explodes
Man on man and dies
But verbal and mental assault
Man on woman
Does not die
It grows and grows
And men not in touch with their feelings
Hardly realise the hurt they do
Simply hit the punch bag
Until they do too much
And then too late
Shocked I am to learn
In Ireland these past 25 years
236 women have died violent deaths
The silent fear of sex has haunted us
So called fallen women
Were felled by men
Catholic culture celibate
And out of touch with life
Pervaded generations
And left them starved of life
We see it now
We need to see it more
Much more to learn
Let’s listen to the voices
Let women speak and let men learn to feel
Brian Fahy
18 January 2022
+ This has been prompted by an article in the Guardian, by Caelainn Hogan, ‘Ashling Murphy’s killing has shocked Ireland – but will it change a culture of misogyny?’